Raising children..

My grandma passed away last year, but thoughts of her remain fresh in my memory. Grandma was a woman of prayer, a woman of faith. I spent many afternoons with her when I was young as she would babysit us whenever my parents were busy at work.

My favourite memory is of my AhMa in her rocking chair, chuckling at our mischievous antics, and sometimes threatening us with the cane if we got out of hand. :) Often, while fanning herself with the old fashioned paper fan, she'd take out an old chinese calender (the ones where you tear the pages out as the day passes). She'd say in Hokkien "teach me the ABC's" and I would teach her, as she practiced, and struggled especially in pronouncing her R's and L's. She loved to learn, and it's amazing how she's read the whole Bible despite not having proper education during her childhood.

In between all these hours spent with her, she'd spend time reminding us to pray. Prayer before meals was always a lengthy afair. When younger, I could never understand her complicated Hokkien, and never really did....I'd just wait wait and wait till I heard her say Amen, then gladly eat my food.

When I was older I realised that her prayers were lengthy simply coz she'd pray for all her children, naming them one by one (10 children!) and then pray for her grandchildren (22 altogether).

I'll never forget the time before I left for the US to further my studies. I sat with her and listened as she spoke. She said "whatever you do, you must put God first. Always remember to pray (ki-to). Don't ever find a guy who's not a Christian. WHen you find a guy, make sure he's someone who loves the Lord...and remember to come home when you're done. Remember...always kito, kito."

I know that when I was away she prayed for me at least twice a day. I know coz she told me so. Perhaps that is the reason why, when at least 80% of my friends dropped away from church, I kept going. It has to be my grandma and my parents' prayers.

One winter vacation when I visited her, she received me with hugs and kisses and said "come, come eat with me. I've only cooked a simple lunch, come eat with me." before we ate she told me "I pray for all my children and all of you at least 2 times a day. Let's pray first." I sat there, partially understanding her prayer...as she mentioned again the names of her 10 children and 20 over grandchildren one by one.

WHen I came back for good...she prayed that I'd find a good husband (and also tried to matchmake with her friend's grandchildren from church!). She prayed for me...all the time. When she left it was very hard to let her go.... but these words of her remain embedded in my heart till now.... "ki-to, ki-to", pray pray. Whenever I face troubles, worries...I'm reminded "ki-to."

I'm not a perfect mum.... but I hope that I will be able to pass this on to my children...that in all circumstances to remain steadfast in the Lord, to trust in Him...and ki-to, to pray, to pray.